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Features

  • Gregg and Mary Ann Fisher are celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. The couple was married by the Rev. Richard DeBell at 7:45 p.m. on June 21, 1969. Their children are Stacy Pollock, Amy Fisher and Cassi Fisher.

  • File this under “stuff you should know” — If you visit the Petrified Forest National Park in Arizona, it’s highly frowned upon to take home pieces of petrified wood — and it’s illegal.

    However, that doesn’t stop people from doing it.

    Evidently, they’re not aware that these contraband souvenirs are cursed.

    As far back as the 1930s, people who pocketed these pieces of wood-turned-to-stone have reported that their sticky fingers have resulted in bad luck.

  • JCTC - CARROLLTON

    Jefferson Community Technical College — Carrollton Campus, 1607 Hwy. 227, in Carrollton is pleased to announce the spring 2019 dean’s list for Trimble County.

    Students must maintain full-time (12 or more credit hours) status and a cumulative GPA of 3.5 or higher to be included.

  • The recent wet, unsettled weather has caused me no end of heartache. My garden rots before my very eyes. My horses are up to their eyes in mud. The mosquitoes are the size of F-16 fighters and possess as deadly an arsenal. My sinuses are in an uproar and a particularly wicked migraine has been my faithful companion for most of this month.

  • I don’t now why I keep trying to grow a garden. I have some of the strangest mishaps known to horticulture. My gardens have produced mutated vegetables, disturbing slimy films, holes in the leaves with no insects in sight and much, much more too ghastly to name.

  • Last Saturday I went to a graduation unlike any other I’ve attended.

    No caps and gowns. No “Pomp and Circumstance.”

    Just a bunch of rag-tag kids with behavior problems.

    George Schmalstig, a local guy in the community who has spent most of his career working with juvenile offenders, heads up a nonprofit organization that takes at-risk kids and teaches them stuff they need to know to keep them from a lifetime in and out of jail.

    He uses dirt bikes to do it.

  • A few weeks ago, I was re-watching the first Marvel “Avengers” movie. They were airing it on television in preparation for the release of “Avengers: Endgame.” It was the first of the “Avengers” franchise and it was the first time all the major characters were together in one film. In one part of the film, Nick Fury has all of “the Earth’s mightiest heroes” together on an aircraft carrier to discuss their plan of action.

  • Back in 2010, on a warm Wednesday evening at a nearby lake, Minnie Sockman’s sins were washed away.

    She was 67 at the time and couldn’t remember ever being baptized, although she thought maybe she had been.

    As a kid, she was in church every Sunday, but then she took a 32-year hiatus from regular church attendance.

    When she started going again she wanted to make sure she was baptized, so, she invited a bunch of her friends to her baptism and me, the newspaper’s religion reporter.

  • I’m no expert at plumbing. Much like electricity I regard it with a mixture of dread and superstition. While I regard both entities with due respect I prefer to respect them across the room, out in the yard or through a conveniently placed window. Respect is one thing; unnecessary bodily damage quite another. I have nothing to prove in these areas and if I do I don’t care.

  • Cats are not the only animals attracted to me. I’ve diversified into reptiles. During the time I’ve walked this earth reptiles have appeared in the strangest places. I’ve poached the scaly catches of cats. Snakes have materialized in my upstairs closet and snakes have appeared on my kitchen floor.

  • A number of months ago, I hung a poster on the wall by my desk.

    The image is a flower that’s starting to bloom and the caption reads: “When you’re in a dark place, you sometimes tend to think you’ve been buried. Perhaps you’ve been planted.

    “Bloom.”

    I’ve been studying that for all these months, thinking about the dark places every one of us has been in or will be in — or is in now.

    It happens to all of us who are human. We live in a fallen world, filled with dark places.

  • The writer of Hebrews 10:24-25 admonishes us “let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another.”

  • Most folks over the age of 60 are familiar with the term Required Minimum Distribution (RMD), however, many don’t understand all the rules associated with taking your RMD. Let’s examine RMDs in this month’s column and hopefully answer any questions you may have on the subject.

  • BY HILDA PARRISH

    Hello, I am a barn. I’m not a red barn or a green barn. I’m not even a blue barn. I’m just a plain old wooden barn.

    I have double doors on the front and double doors on the back. Mr. Farmer, my owner, calls me his Tobacco Barn. He has a Hay Barn and a Cow Barn, but they can tell you about themselves later.

  • My husband took me to Washington D.C. as an eighth anniversary trip. I packed everything I thought we could possibly need; everything except rain gear. We had one small umbrella but everything else was thoroughly absorbent; possibly ultra-absorbent.

    Washington D.C. has incredible traffic around the clock. The streets are never empty and the lights are always red. The only way to get around is by scooter, bike, foot or fervent wishes. We dropped the car in a parking garage; a garage that held our car hostage; and set out to hit the town.

  • All of us, at some point, will go through a tough time. The truth is we’re either heading into a trial, in a trial, or coming out of a trial. I don’t know what it might be for you, but I’d guess you are probably battling one fire or another. It could be a financial, health-related, relational or employment. We all face fires.

  • A week or so ago, I went to a celebration of life service at a church I’d never been to before.

    Behind the altar was a huge glass wall with a huge glass mosaic crucifix in the middle.

    While I waited for the service to start, I studied the crucifix, the intricate pieces of colored glass fit together to form Christ’s body.

    Unlike a jigsaw puzzle, these glass pieces didn’t fit together smoothly and perfectly. The edges appeared to be rough. Perhaps the artist had used broken bits and pieces? I couldn’t tell.

  • BY CHARLES LISTON | Special to the Banner

    Some 1,800 Trimble County residents belong to Kentucky Farm Bureau, an organization supporting agriculture, enjoy many benefits such as affordable auto, home, farm, business, life, and health insurance, and more.