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Features

  • [Editor’s Note: This is the third article in our four-part series on Partner Violence]

    By Mega Will and                Phil Lloyd-Sidle
    The Center for Women and Families

  • When I first started writing professionally, I mostly wrote humor stories for Christian magazines.
    It was fun, and I often cracked myself up. But it was also hard work. With humor, you have to get the rhythm right. You have to choose your words carefully and economically.
    And you have to know the ending, the punchline, often before you write your opening line.
    With humor, you write to the punchline. It’s all about how you end.

  • Nov. 5, 1987 (30 Years Ago)

  • I’ve always been a champion of the underdog. Perhaps because I wasn’t on the A-List myself. My circle of friends was composed of fine people. They, like me, were not easily categorized. However we were regarded by others, it didn’t stop us from having a lot of fun.

  • The other day someone congratulated our features editor, Sarah Gatling, on her promotion, which was nice, except she didn’t get a promotion.
    Sarah said if she got a promotion she’d like to be promoted to potentate -- that sounds like a cool thing to be, she said.
    It reminded me of the hymn, “Crown Him With Many Crowns,” in which Jesus is called “the potentate of time,” and also reminded me that a few years ago, Sarah gave me a very old hymnal, copyrighted in 1924, called “Harvest Hymns.”

  • October 29, 1987 (30 Years Ago)
    Diane Wheeler learned last week that she has passed the bar exam and serves as law clerk for the 12th Judicial Circuit. As law clerk, Wheeler is involved in research, criminal and civil procedures, orders, etc. The 12th Judicial Circuit includes Trimble, Henry and Oldham counties. Wheeler has been employed at the Circuit Court office since Sept. 15.

  • Our resident skunk population has grown to three: each animal larger than the last. I thought I knew the average size of these critters but I was sadly mistaken. The skunk syndicate moved under our porch with the possums. I’m beginning to believe that either some kind of party is raging or they’re planning a coup to overthrow the humans and take the house.

  • When I was about 2 years old, I bopped my baby brother with a wooden hammer and once put a wad of gum in my sister’s hair.
    I was part of a group of kids who called a girl in our neighborhood “fungus face,” and in eighth grade I spread vicious rumors about a girl who I thought stole my boyfriend.
    Once I shoplifted a bottle of Compound W wart remover and a Yardley Lip Slicker lipstick from Thrifty Drug Store.

  • Oct. 15, 1987 (30 Years Ago)

  • We all know the story of the elves and the shoe cobbler. The elves would visit the shoe maker after he went to bed. The next morning, he would awaken to dozens of pairs of shoes made by the elves.
    His labors were lightened by the kindness and thoughtfulness of his nighttime visitors.
    I have nocturnal visitations as well. Unfortunately, mine seem bent on undoing all my efforts of the day plus adding a touch of mayhem. Allow me to introduce Dish Gremlins, Silverware Hobgoblins and Lint Trap Trolls.

  • Lately, I’ve been pondering the story Jesus told of the lost son, or what’s more commonly called the parable of the prodigal son.
    The son demands his inheritance from his father, which is basically him telling his dad he wishes him dead, and then takes the money and runs far away, squandering his wealth on wild living.
    When he ends up broke, he finds a job feeding pigs and finds himself so hungry that he longs to eat the pig food.

  • October 8, 1987 (30 Years Ago)
    Genon Ginn Hensley of Carrollton has been named assistant Commonwealth’s Attorney for the 12th Judicial District by Bruce Hamilton. Hensley is the first female to serve as assistant in the district which includes Oldham, Henry and Trimble counties. Hensley graduated from law school in 1984 and served a two-year stint with the Jefferson County public defender’s office. Hensley replaces Eurie Hayes Smith III who has been assistant for about a year.

  • The Gingko tree is an absolute work of the art of nature; from its beautiful shape to its fan-shaped leaves, leaves which change from luminous green to translucent gold. One would be hard-pressed to find a tree of such beauty.
    This lovely tree doesn’t show her age. The “Silver Apricot,” as she is known in China, has an ancient history. The gingko is speculated to have existed during prehistoric times. One tree growing in China is approximately 3500 years old. She was introduced to the U.S. in the 1700’s. Once here she found a loyal following.

  • A number of years ago, a man I know had multiple surgeries on his hand, which left him without feeling in it.
    He had had surgery because of pain, so in one respect, not feeling meant he also no longer felt pain, so that’s a good thing, right?
    However, as a craftsman, that also meant he couldn’t use his hand to do his job, which required using both hands and all his fingers.